Tweeners

As I've said before, I get my dating advice from 16-year-olds on MTV (mindless television). Last night on Newport Harbor, Chrissy's dad asked Chase and Kylie if their relationship was casual or serious. Chrissy takes it upon herself to chime in with, "They're tweeners." Apparently, "tweeners" refers to couples who find themselves in-between the casual and serious stage. By this logic, TheGuy and I would be "tweeners." We're more than casual but we're not really serious. We've established the "no hooking up with others" clause, but on an emotional level, we've got some distance.

My question is this: in your upper 20's, what does a "serious relationship" mean? Monogamy? Building toward a future together? I suppose it means both. As you get older, dating expectations change. Marriage and babies enter the picture. If it's not in the back of your mind, it's in the back of the minds of those around you. You're "supposed" to get married. It's what you do; an adulthood ritual.

At 27, the word "relationship" is intimidating. Remember back when you're biggest fear was having your crush's mom pick up the phone when you called his/her house? This is not junior high. You can't send your friend to dump your bf/gf at the drinking fountain between third and fourth period. The stakes are raised; there's a lot more to gain, and subsequently, a lot more to lose.

By now you've had your heart broken or broken the heart of someone else. With some experience under your belt, you've figured out what you want/don't want in a significant other. But it's never any easier. It just means you're better equipped to eliminate the players/gays/losers, or what have you. It fails, however, to nullify the fact you take a giant leap of faith every time you settle into a new relationship. The risk is incalculable when you make the conscientious decision to put your complete and total trust in another person.