Mean Girls
Dating back to fifth grade slumber parties, I recall a period where my friends and I went through this beauty pageant phase. We'd take turns playing the host while everyone else would participate as beauty queen contestants. We never went so far to do a swimsuit competition, but we'd dress up, make fools of ourselves with silly talents and answer questions such as, "How would you make the world a better place?"
In the end, the host would be responsible for crowning a winner. At the time, we all laughed it off as no big deal, but the truth of the matter was, it was a big deal! How could you not feel disappointed when you weren't crowned the prettiest?
Our friend, Susan, was heavy-set with curly, strawberry-blonde hair, freckles and glasses. Her physical appearance made her the butt of all jokes. When we held these contests, the rest of us pitied her, really. We'd conspire behind her back when we felt as though it was "her turn" to win. I don't think she ever caught on, but she was at a clear disadvantage. Or at least, in our minds she was. We made awful wisecracks, not to her face, that reflected more than her appearance. We ridiculed her intelligence, her lame jokes and her wardrobe.
Susan went to a different school the following year, so the target simply moved to another friend. We greased her locker with vaseline, wrote her a love letter from a "secret admirer" and spent hours on the phone gossiping behind her back. We even came up with inside jokes she wasn't a part of with the sole purpose of excluding her.
Over the years, I find that not much has changed from my pageant days. Ever wonder why women go to the bathroom in groups? Womens' public restrooms serve as the breeding ground for all juicy gossip. Those bathroom walls know all!
I'm not naive. I know I've had my fair share of nasty things said about me behind my back. In fact, there are times I hesitate to leave a room full of girl friends for fear of what will be said when I depart. If paranoia sets in, you can always cup your ear to the door, as one of my college friends did, appalled when she heard, "What smells worse? 'Boy' or vanilla?" 'Boy' referring to the sleep smell of her boyfriend and vanilla being the scent of her body spray.
As I've said, I partake in this despicable behavior. If I'm going to hell, so be it. Yet I find myself asking why. I fail to come up with a good answer. Does it chalk up to insecurity, jealousy, validation? All of the above? I'm not proud of myself. On the contrary, it's shameful. And it bewilders me. Just trying to be honest and seek understanding. Why do women act in this manner?
4 comments:
*disclaimer* I'll never understand you people.
I work in an industry dominated by womenfolk, and thus, have been exposed to many things I would never learned otherwise.
I was very surprised how much women hate each other and the degree of competition amongst them.
Can you confirm something for me? When women dress nicely, is that to look better than other women, or to look good in general?
Oh yah, and Mean Girls was hilarious!
Yikes, that's rough, you've got Gloria AND surrounded by the majority of women in the workplace! People are already cranky enough at work. Seen any cat fights?
I definitely think women dress for other women. I thought I had posted about that before, but if I haven't, I meant to, or I started to at some point but never finished. Women are always checking out other women, silently judging. Guys generally don't notice whether a woman's handbag matches her outfit etc., but it's a huge deal for us. Plus women are a lot harder to impress than men!
No cat fights, close though. There used to be three women who didn't like each other. It was very awkward b/c I was friends with all three and each one would talk sh*t about the other two.
Besides that, there are also "The Mommies" to make things worse. Three babies born within a year... One will come in and start to talk about puke or diapers and the other two will try to top her gross story with one of their own.
I'll take a look around, see if I can find that other post. I guess I should mention, IT'S GOOD TO BE A GUY!
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