Ex BFF's

It's to be expected that men will come and go, but it's a different story with your female friendships, perhaps the most complex of all. Several years ago, two of my college friends and I were in for the shock of our lives when out of the blue, one of our close college friends, NoIdentity, emailed us making asinie accusations regarding our behavior toward her and her new man, ToolforBrains. Ironically, she never would have met ToolforBrains (now her tool-of-a-husband) if it hadn't been for us forcing their introduction at the bar. She wasn't interested when approached by Tool's friend, on his behalf, but we were drunk and chatty so we scurried over to the booth they occupied.

In her email, she claimed to take offense for everything under the sun -- covering everything from us secretly excluding her from the group to ignoring ToolforBrains, thus deeming us "immature high schools." She even went so far as to badger us for making fun of ToolforBrains' tapered jeans. Are you kidding me?!?! We would have ridiculed ANYONE for that fashion faux-pas. Seriously. It was 2004, not 1994. It's not like we were cruel enough to say anything to the guy's face.

She received three angry, defensive emails in return, only to never hear back from her. It wasn't until a year later when I made plans with a mutual friend, whom unbeknownst to me, invited NoIdentity to join us. It was awkward, yes, but at times throughout conversation, it was as if nothing ever happened. It was like seeing an old ex for the first time in a long time when you make it a point to block out all the bad memories. After that, we made amends in that we continued communication and hung out on occasion, but it was never really the same. Nor will it ever be.

When a relationship falls apart, drama is guaranteed to follow, but what about when the same happens to a friendship?? It never receives the same attention, but it's just as dramatic, if not moreso! I met NoIdentity my first week of college and we immediately clicked, spending nearly every waking moment together. The fact she was willing to just throw away her closest friendships and the manner in which she went about it, all for the sake of ToolforBrains, spoke volumes.

Career Envy

In high school, I had this delusion that when I got to college, everything would fall into place for me. I'd receive my degree, meet my husband and we'd both land terrific jobs after graduation. Well, it's been 4 years since I graduated college and I'm very dissatisfied career-wise. How many people are actually fortunate enough to do something they are truly passionate about? Off-hand, I can only recall one friend who is in the perfect field for her. It frustrates me to the point where it interferes with my desire to pursue writing. I wish it had the reverse effect so it would motivate me, not bring me down, but that's not the case. Using this blog as an outlet has definitely been helpful in the short amount of time I've had it, but it's surely not enough to compensate for my discontent.